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COPYRIGHT 2002 Mothering Magazine
My daughter Molly was born at home, as planned, with a direct-entry midwife. Soon after the delivery I noticed that she was very warm. Although Molly's apgar score was a nine after five minutes, she remained lethargic and silent and did not open her eyes. We took her temperature; her fever of 101 alarmed the midwife, who insisted we transfer Molly to a hospital. Against all my instincts, we finally agreed, taking her to the very place we had wanted so much to avoid. At the hospital, after blood draws, spinal taps, chest X rays, an ultrasound, and a CT scan failed to identify the cause of Molly's fever, an MRI revealed that she had severe brain injury and was unable to control her body temperature.
The ten days Molly spent in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit were a nightmare. She was subjected to many invasive tests, had a catheter and umbilical IV, and was hooked to monitors. Pumped full of medications that knocked her out completely, she had no reflexes or brain waves. The doctors told us she would not survive and suggested we go home and get some rest. They said they would disconnect her IV and call us when she died.
But my husband, David, and I refused to give up on Molly. I wanted hers to be...
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