Racist families: we all got 'EM.(OFF COLOR)

ON THE HEEL5 of an historic presidential election, the topic of race will undoubtedly present itself around American dinner tables this holiday season and add to the usual familial anxiety created by the annual trip home. For some of us, it might come up blatantly, like this: "Mom. can you pass the gravy and tell me why you couldn't vote for a Black man?"

These awkward, and sometimes endearing, family moments tend to occur over the holidays because many of us have an unapologetic grandmother who hates Mexicans (or "whitey," the Black guy next door), or a teenage nephew who loves to throw the n-word around. Depending on how quickly the booze flows and the number of ugly sweaters gifted, a conversation about race with your family could end up making you question whether these people are actually related to you.

Although your family's less-than-nuanced racial commentary may sound like fingernails on a chalkboard to you, I urge you to think of these situations as "raceporturnties" (look at me, inventing new words for "the movement") to engage on the topic of race despite trying to digest an embarrassing amount of gingerbread men.

Below, I've outlined a few options to make the most of your raceportunity--and the lessons that can be drawn from them. Option 1: Keep it real.

A friend told me that at a family gathering, her dad expressed his nagging suspicion that his Arab roommate had stolen his barbeque tools. My friend asked him why he thought it was his roommate, recognizing that such an act was a daring affront to her father's backyard masculinity. Her dad nonchalantly responded, "He's Arab. Everyone knows they steal."

My friend (the white, outspoken. progressive attorney with an admirable tendency to challenge people's views) immediately expressed her offense.

To her disappointment, he reminded her, "You know that I only feel that way "about Mexicans and Arabs.'' Lesson 1: Keeping it real can backfire, but it tells you what you're really up against. Option 2: Let "em play the age card.