The good, the bad and the plain disgusting.

(From Off Licence News)

I like to think that being a retailer makes me a good customer. Whenever I buy anything elsewhere, I try to be polite, friendly and, although I make sure whoever is serving me remembers who is the customer and where the balance of power lies within our relationship, I try to be nice about it. Accordingly, I'm always irritated (but to be honest, not surprised) when customers behave badly. Now, I'm not talking about the really rude ones, they are easy to ignore. But there are little things that really bug me. For instance, digging around in the Abottom of your pocket, purse or bag for money and then dumping it all the counter inevitably leaves a load of fluff, tobacco and suspiciously curly black hairs in its wake. I know, I know, it's trivial, but sweeping someone's pocket detritus up just gives me the heebie- jeebies. Ditto when someone gives you change they've been holding for a while - eeuw , it's all warm, and arrgghh, sometimes a bit moist . Whatever next? Shall I plunge my hand in your trouser pocket and rummage around for some coppers? Detritus and effluvia seem to pester me. The other day, a chap popped into the shop asking if we sold milk, only to be redirected to the corner shop. As he left, he started to do that slightly wonky, stampy walk that signified that he'd trodden in something rather unpleasant. My sniggering at his misfortune was Ashort-lived, as it soon became apparent he'd trodden in a big, squishy pile of dog mess (and when I say mess, I obviously mean shit) on his way INTO the ...