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The TUMP in Love.(Poem)

Quadrant

| May 01, 2008 | Whitworth, John | COPYRIGHT 2008 Quadrant Magazine Company, Inc. This material is published under license from the publisher through the Gale Group, Farmington Hills, Michigan. All inquiries regarding rights should be directed to the Gale Group. (Hide copyright information)Copyright

 
THE TUMP IN LOW 
 
(TUMP stands for Totally Useless Male Poet, 
according to Wendy Cope. I am not a TUMP, 
Wendy says, because I have a car.) 
 
   Boy poets have these little beards 
   And most of them wear specs. 
   Though only technically weirds, 
   They mostly have these little beards, 
   The hairies overtop the sheareds, 
   They're terrible at sex, 
   Boy poets with their little beards 
   And unsuccessful necks. 
 
   Girl poets, quite contrariwise, 
   Are up for it in spades. ...

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