Say It All in Six Words.(The Talk of the Town)('Not Quite What I Was Planning')(Book review)

Brevity: a good thing in writing. Exploited by texters, gossip columnists, haikuists. Not associated with the biography genre. But then--why shouldn't it be? Life expectancies rise; attention spans shrink. Six words can tell a story. That's a new book's premise, anyway. "Not Quite What I Was Planning." A compilation of teeny tiny memoirs. The forebear, it's assumed, is Hemingway. (Legend: he wrote a miniature masterpiece. "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." Slightly sappy, but a decent sixer.)

The book's originator: SMITH online magazine. It started as a reader contest: Your life story in six words. The magazine was flooded with entries. Five hundred-plus submissions per day. That's two, three words a minute. "We almost crashed," an editor said. Memoirs from plumbers and a dominatrix ("Fix a toilet, get paid crap"; "Woman Seeks Men--High Pain Threshold"). The editors have culled the best. And, happily, spliced in celebrity autobiographies: "Canada freezing. Gotham beckons. Hello, Si!" "Well, I thought it was funny." "Couldn't cope so I wrote songs." (Graydon Carter, Stephen Colbert, Aimee Mann.) Mario Batali makes a memorable appearance: "Brought it to a boil, often." So does Jimmy Wales, of Wikipedia: "Yes, you can edit this biography." Still, there are not nearly enough. Where's Eli Manning, and Katie Couric? ("Little brother; big game; last laugh"? "Morning girl goes serious at night"?) And what of the Presidential candidates? ("From Ill.; met Bill; iron will.") Something from Obama would be nice: "Hope is stronger than dope, kids!" A Canadian minister has done Jesus': "God called; Mother listened; I responded." Quieter lives can be condensed, too. The editors offer a few guidelines. "Try not to think too hard." That's from SMITH's editor, Larry Smith. It's impossible, of course, to follow. There's the temptation to be ironic: "Born in California. Then nothing happened." Or to blurt out something angry: "Everyone who loved me is dead." "Try to use specifics," Smith added. ("After Harvard, had baby with crackhead.") That doesn't rule out dazzling nonsense. "Eat mutate ...