Hell is God's voice-mail system.(Brief Article)(Statistical Data Included)

If the end of the world were tomorrow, I might walk I bravely into the Valley of the shadow -- just as long as I knew there would be no voice-mail.

In recent months, the Almighty Conglomerates have launched me into voice-mail purgatory so many times I cannot tell you whether I am coming up or going down.

"Welcome to God's voice-mail system. To check on the status of your account, press one. To establish a new account, press two. To appeal for judgment of your account, press three. ..."

A gigantic mortgage company that has inexplicably failed to pay my property taxes for more than a year put up a wall of voice mail so impenetrable that I threw up my hands and went back to the local mortgage broker who first made me the loan. He waded in …