The Pleasures of Apartment Life.(Poem)

 
THE PLEASURES OF APARTMENT LIFE 
 
   1. 
 
   The pleasures of apartment life 
   do not include romance. 
   We do not talk among ourselves; 
   there might just be the chance 
 
   that one might prove presumptuous 
   and drop in uninvited. 
   We nod once only on the stairs 
   if, briefly, we are sighted. 
 
   A name or two are known to some, 
   exchanged by accident. 
   We're mainly paying off our views 
   though some just pay the rent. 
 
   Our way of life is truly quiet, 
   a triumph of the proper. 
   The worst that's happened so far is ... 
   a stranger's used our hopper 
 
   and so we've all been given keys 
   to help us combat sin. 
   We lock the stranger's rubbish out 
   and our own rubbish in. 
 
   It's good to be secure like this; 
   you could not say we're bored. 
   The Body Corporate ensures 
   there's nothing untoward. 
 
   2. 
 
   Our floorplans are a mirror image, 
   kitchens side by side, 
   bathrooms shining in reverse 
   and nowhere much to hide. 
 
   Master bedrooms nose to nose 
   will never risk a squeak 
   for privacy is sacred here 
   and won't presume to speak. 
 
   Two thicknesses of brick between us 
   and just a little air 
   prevent life seeping through the walls 
   though not so much despair. 
 
   We try our best at being twins 
   to suit the builder's style. 
   On weekends things get out of sync; 
   a few are seen to smile 
 
   when drifting home a little high 
   and entering their dreams. 
   The Body Corporate does not 
   encourage such extremes. 
 
   And just a few on Sunday mornings 
   make love across their beds-- 
   and those who hear them through the wall 
   half-wish that they were dead. 
 
   By Monday all's OK again 
   and in the parking bay 
   successively we buzz the gate 
   and briskly purr away. 
 
   3. 
 
   The pleasures of apartment life 
   do not include the grass; 
   the balcony is concrete and 
   defined by toughened glass. 
 
   The sky is all we need to prune; 
   the clouds replace the release 
   A balcony is never mown; 
   we're rarely on our knees. 
 
   The balcony complete with sky 
   is one ...