To know list: 9 things to make you an instant expert this week.(KNOW IT ALL)

1 THE MAIN EVENT

It's a bird. It's a plane. It's the Rocket!

After months of sitting on the edge of our sofas scanning the crawl on ESPN for the news, it's time to get excited. Really. Any week--perhaps even this one--a 40-something future Hall of Famer is going to make a major announcement. No. Barry Bonds is not going to 'fess up to his past.

We're talking about another geezer who can't stay out of the news. Roger Clemens, two months shy of 44, dropped a few more hints last week that a decision on his immediate future is forthcoming. Word from his agents was that Clemens has begun his boot camp workouts and plans to tell the world by the middle of June--probably sooner--if, when and where he's going to work this summer.

The obvious answers: yes, July and Houston. The Astros reportedly have offered the big Texan between $3 million and $4 million a month to return to his hometown team. They also would give him the same setup as in the past two seasons: He would have the freedom to show up only when it's his turn to pitch. With the Astros, there's also the chance he could pitch in September with his eldest son, Koby, lined up at third base. That, however, might have to be next year's story because Koby got off to a slow start in Class A before injuring a finger and being sent home to rehab.

Though the Yankees need Clemens the most and, based on their spending habits, would not be outbid, they can't do much about the fact New York remains a three-hour flight from Houston. Boston is even farther. Rangers owner Tom Hicks has told reporters he's willing to offer free transportation if Clemens wants to be a Ranger, but Arlington isn't a very pleasant place to pitch, especially in July and August.

There's always the possibility Clemens will not pitch again. But he wouldn't keep us holding our breath for months just to announce that, would he?--Stan McNeal