Here comes Mighty Michaels.(Remote Patrol)(television sportscaster Al Michaels on ABC)(Column)

So, ABC persuaded Al Michaels to be Voice of the NBA. This ensures a successful makeover--nay, mulligan--with billions of fans flocking back, resurrecting Nielsens from NBC's halcyon days of Michael Jordan. Do you believe in miracles?

I'm glad Michaels answered the Bat Phone. He's an upgrade, the generation's premier play-by-play guy/host. Still, I am skeptical that handing him the headset cures the leprosy ABC contracted from its inaugural season of basketball, including The Lowest-Rated Finals Ever.

For one, this truth is self-evident: No contemporary sportscaster can spike ratings, any more than Billy Crystal generates bonus points for the Academy Awards. John Madden hasn't increased Monday Night Football ratings. Neither has Albeeno. If he possessed such magic, they'd assign him Bonnie Hunt's show.

Michaels adroitly has voiced over Super Bowls, World Series, Stanley Cup finals, golf, figure skating and the Olympics, in which his enduring signature line was uttered. Hoops? Um, regional college games and, before that, UCLA and Bill Walton on local TV, plus an internship as Chick Hearn's first Lakers sidekick.

"I am very ...