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LIFETIME GUARANTEE
A Wisconsin reader found that a pair of his socks had holes at the heels. Happily, they came with a lifetime guarantee. But when he tried to return them, our reader told us, the manufacturer said that the guarantee covered the lifetime of the socks (now deceased), not of their owner. We checked, and indeed, although manufacturers' defects were covered, holes from normal wear weren't. That got us thinking about warranties, which are used as a selling tool but often don't measure up to expectations. This assortment comes from other amused, or annoyed, readers.
Fanny pack. A lifetime warranty lasted five years from the date of purchase.
Adapter plugs. A lifetime warranty excluded "normal wear and tear."
Watch. There was a 10-year warranty against "defects in materials and workmanship." But that did not ...