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APPLICATION FOR PERMANENT CANADIAN RESIDENCE.

The New Yorker

| November 22, 2004 | McCall, Bruce | COPYRIGHT 2004 All rights reserved. Reproduced by permission of The Condé Nast Publications Inc. This material is published under license from the publisher through the Gale Group, Farmington Hills, Michigan.  All inquiries regarding rights should be directed to the Gale Group. (Hide copyright information)Copyright

(Please use a soft pencil.)

1. Did you say you were thinking about coming up to live in Canada? Undecided___ Maybe___ Awfully big step___ Other___

The clearer your intentions, the better our government can estimate how many welcome-gift bottles of maple syrup, etc., to order.

2. Not to be too nosy, but are you mad at all governments or just the one particular government? All___ Just the one___

We ask only because Canada has a government, too, and, if you mean to be critical just on principle, maybe it would be better if you didn't come here. Not that our government is perfect, but we think it runs pretty well, all things considered, so other Canadians might take you for a "troublemaker"--hardly the nicest way to start off in a new country!

3. I want to come and live in Canada because (check all that apply): You can make right turns on red lights, just like in California.___ I missed out on the fifties.___ Curling is my life.___ You can be photographed with a Mountie almost

anytime.___ "Chesterfield" is a better word than "sofa."___ You can fly hassle-free from there to Cuba for wild weekends.____

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