Back into the bizarro world of sports.(My Turn)

On September 20, I again will be presented as a maven, an insider and a general go-to guy in an arena for which I am not only ill-suited, I actually have no suit and can't find the arena. I'm speaking of the world of professional sports.

As George Costanza in Seinfeld, I spent several seasons working as the assistant to the traveling secretary for the New York Yankees. Almost weekly, I strolled into George Steinbrenner's office. I instructed Bernie Williams and Derek Jeter in batting practice. I advised in trades. I was a member of the organization.

Now, I am about to portray Tony Kleinman on the new CBS series Listen Up. Tony is a sports columnist and commentator on a daily sports talk program. The character is based on real-life columnist Tony Kornheiser, who writes sports for the Washington Post and talks sports for his ESPN show Pardon the Interruption.

People always assume I must be a sports guy. People probably assume all guys are sports guys. However, I am a Broadway musicals/chick flicks/ Barry Manilow kind of guy. I even know Liza Minnelli personally. If I weren't a devout heterosexual, married 22 years, believe me, the rumors would be a-flyin'. Rumors aside, I am not a sports guy--much to the chagrin of many in my family.

My uncle, Jack Simon, was the director of Mets, Knicks and Rangers games during the late 1950s, '60s and '70s. I attended many of those games with my three cousins, two of whom became professional sports broadcasters. They turned our early years in the bleachers into careers because they cared about the games. I, too, have somehow turned those years into a career. The difference is, I don't give a rat's ...

Don't get me wrong, I love a good game. I will happily go to a stadium or arena, drink my beer and watch for my mug on the Jumbotron. I even get a kick out of my 8-year-old son's soccer games. (Heck, ...