What squirrels really want.(FLORIDA WEST)(Column)

Byline: David Grimes

It occurred to me recently that squirrels are getting a little too uppity.

I have several pieces of evidence to support this thesis.

A few minutes ago, while I was sipping coffee in my office, a gray squirrel leaped onto a window screen right next to my head. I was startled so badly that I spilled my coffee all over the Sudoku puzzle I was unsuccessfully working. (So I guess this event was not without its upside.)

The squirrel, meanwhile, was still clinging, head-downward, to the screen. The eye that I could see was glassy and dark and appeared to me to have a distinct malevolent streak in it. Its tail flicked in a …