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Today's lesson: don't lose your head.

The Sporting News

| July 08, 2002 | Kindred, Dave | COPYRIGHT 2002 Sporting News Publishing Co. This material is published under license from the publisher through the Gale Group, Farmington Hills, Michigan.  All inquiries regarding rights should be directed to the Gale Group. (Hide copyright information)Copyright

John McEnroe without the steroids: Calista Flockhart.

Jeff Kent without Barry Bonds: Tom Arnold without Roseanne.

Tennis without Anna Kournikova: Lindsay Davenport.

Baseball has done it again. Just when so many teams at last seem to have hope, those Expos simply reach out and get the player they need for the last-half run.

News of the year 2015: Lennox Lewis and Venus Williams watch their 12-year-old son whip up on the little Agassi brat.

Yao Ming, Nikoloz Tskitishvili, Maybyner Hilario, Bostjan Nachbar, Nenad Krstic: Time to reprogram the ol' NBA spell-checker.

The nation's first drive-through barber shop must be in Milwaukee: how else to explain Bud Selig's haircut?

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