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* What could be more intoxicating than being in a blissfully high-on-life relationship? Hmmm ... nothing comes to mind. You probably couldn't care less how it happens, as long as it does. But the fact is, the way you fall in love can indicate how your couplehood will develop. "Each style has its advantages and disadvantages, but if you know what to anticipate, you stand a better chance of making the relationship last," says Ayala Pines, Ph.D., author of Falling in Love. We got the lowdown from love experts on the four most common head-overheels scenarios and how to up your odds of a happily-ever-after outcome.
love at first sight
It happened the moment you met: Your pulse started pounding, your hands started shaking, and you felt like a swarm of butterflies were slam-dancing in your stomach. In other words, there was an instantaneous allure and adoration.
Surprisingly, love at first sight is a well-documented phenomenon. But even the pros can't really explain why this insta-attachment happens, except to say that it's a combination of physical attraction, being at the right place at the right time, and your subconscious picking up on clues that you don't even recognize.
Pair potential: "My best friend fixed me tip with her friend John," says Deirdre *, 25. "I'm not sure why, but I felt such a quick connection with this virtual stranger. The date went so well, I totally lost track of time. When I got home and told my roommate that I'd just met my future husband, she thought I was insane. But two years later, my feelings haven't changed. It was tree love from the beginning."
It turns out that there's a good chance Deirdre's love link will endure. "In my survey of 1,500 people, 55 percent of those who said they fell in love at first sight ended up getting married," says Earl Naumann, author of Love at First Sight. One reason why LAFS twosomes last may be the increased likelihood of open communication, which is key to keeping you together. If you're convinced that you're karmically connected within hours of meeting, chances are, you'll both be able to bare your souls without fear of rejection.
But there are love land mines to watch out for. "When you're swept off your feet so quickly, it's easy to focus on your future and neglect your bond in the here and now," explains Pines. So concentrate on creating new mutual interests and answering real-time questions (for example, "Are you happy in your job?" and "Are you close with your family?") as well as discussing whether you want to wind up living in a city or a suburb. That way, you will really get to know each other instead of just feeling like you do.
Source: HighBeam Research, The four ways to fall in love: whether it's an instant attraction or...