The Bad Thing Nice Girls Do in Bed.(how to improve sexual relations through communication)

Have you convinced your man he's hitting homers in the sack when he's really striking out? It's time to come clean and get satisfaction without crushing his confidence.

* In a perfect world, you'd feel comfortable enough with anew guy to share your sexual wish list the second you slip between the sheets. In reality, however, even the most confident women are cautious about correcting a man's mattress missteps. But as your level of closeness and desire to scale new sexual heights soar, you need to stop exaggerating and start giving him the honest feedback he needs to please you for real. "Being able to tell your partner what you want sets the stage for more exciting and intimate sex in the long run," says Michael Plaut, Ph.D., president of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research. The trick is fessing up without puncturing his pride. Here, ways to cease your sack charades and move on to some honest hot-and-heavy passion play.

PLEASURE DECEPTION 1

His Kissing Style Is Killer

Better-sex solution: Does he try to remove your tonsils with his tongue, make icky snakelike flicking motions, or slobber all over your chin? Don't kiss the guy goodbye yet. His smooch can be salvaged, says Sari Locker, author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Being Sexy (Alpha Books, 2001).

To tweak his technique, first focus on what's working. "The key is to start with a positive comment--even if it's just 'Your lips feel so nice'--and then gently suggest that you want to try something new," says Locker. If you call it a new or different technique rather than a better one, he won't feel like his style is being slammed. You can also lead by example, as Angie [*], 27, found. "My guy used to stick his tongue halfway down my throat," she says. "To get him to chill out, I'd slowly pull away whenever he got too enthusiastic. I'd pause, then move back in with the gentlest tongue pressure. He eventually caught on."

PLEASURE DECEPTION 2