Why Your 20s Are So Tough.

It may seem like torture at the time, says novelist Darcey Steinke, but the turbulence of your post-teen years serves a purpose.

I have a recurring dream that never fails to freak me out: Late for a job interview, I drag a suitcase filled with Ramen noodles down into the subway to catch a train to Manhattan. On the platform, a dark-suited man carrying a briefcase informs me that I'm not wearing any shoes. My stomach knots up, and the overwhelming anxiety about the future that I felt throughout my 20s comes rushing back to me in an instant.

Every age group has its challenges, but nothing is more terrifying than those first years when you are cut loose from both family and school and are expected to be a fully functioning adult. Your 20s are the most uncertain time in your life, and sometimes that uncertainty can be stifling. But looking back, I also know that despite how trying that period was, what I learned then has made the obstacles that have come my way since easier to handle.

When I was just out of school, my finances were precarious, and the worry of paying bills often kept me up at night. I wanted to be a novelist, a job that requires massive self-confidence and determination and, unlike a stockbroker or a lawyer has no steady paycheck. But it's not just artists who must have a tremendous belief in their own untested abilities when they're trying to launch careers. All 20somethings experience the fear of facing the unchartered waters of the workplace.

In fact, almost everything in your life at that point is trial and error; including relationships. When I ...