Employees create your best- or worst-advertising. (editorial)

Consumer experts tell us that the best advertising is provided by satisfied customers. They al that, on average, people tend to comment on a bad experience almost four times more often than on a good one.

Case in point. After my father died, mom, her sister and dad's sister lived together for several years. Then, a fall made it impossible for mom to continue caring for her older relatives, and all three were admitted to the same nursing home within a few months of each other.

Knowing that three members of my family were in a nursing home, friends and co-workers often talked with me when facing a similar situation. Should they place their aged, infirm relatives in a home? What would happen to them there? How could they choose the best facility? Was help available to meet the staggering costs?

My knowledge was limited, but - since in the land of the blind the one-eyed man is king - I tried to share my experience and either answer their questions or guide them to someone who could.

Before mom died, I found myself emphasizing one word, one concept over and again. Care. A decision to entrust your loved one to a nursing home, and which home to choose, should hinge on your answer to the ofttimes difficult question, "Where can he or she get the best care?"

We had always been pleased by the care mom and my aunts received, and we told people about it. Mom's sister was so concerned about the way she looked, and the beautician at the home enjoyed doing her hair just the way she wanted it. That person cared. Dad's sister, at age 99, still savored good food, and got it from the home's dietitian and kitchen staff. Those people also cared.

Mom's needs were simple and few. When eyes grew too dim to read her beloved Bible and volumes of poetry, nurse's aides read them to her. They cared. And on some evenings, if mom wanted to go to bed and I had not visited or called, she would ask her favorite nurse to allow her to use the desk phone so she could tell me a brief "goodnight." That nurse always found time to wheel mom's Geri-chair to the phone, because she cared.