Ask him anything: advice from our guy guru, Jonathan Small.(Love & Lust)(Column)

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QUESTION: My boyfriend has one female friend. They're really dose, they hang out by themselves, he never asks me to join them, and oh, yeah--she's gorgeous. Is he going to cheat on me with her?.

ANSWER: Ah, the age-old question: Can a man be friends with a woman he finds attractive? As a guy with a few hot friends myself, I'll admit, I've definitely thought about fooling around with them. And the hotter the friend, the greater the temptation.

Still, you shouldn't assume your guy is going to cheat just because he spends time alone with this girl. The fact that he never asks you to join them could just mean that he likes to talk to her about things he couldn't talk about in front of you--namely, you and your relationship. And assuming the friend isn't an evil skank, chances are, she has your back in those conversations and advises him on how to make you happy.

But sure, there's a chance he will be or already has been unfaithful. You just need to trust that he's not, and in order to do that, you need to get to know the girl. Since your guy isn't making that happen--that's an insensitive mistake on his part--suggest that he invite her along next time you're hanging out in a group setting. Say something like "A bunch of us are going to this bar later on, and you should bring so-and-so--I'd love to meet her." Don't put any pressure on him or come across as suspicious. Then, when you see them together, let your woman's intuition guide you. You'll know if something's fishy.

QUESTION: I brought a guy home after our second date, and when things started to heat up, I grabbed a condom from my bedside table ... but he stopped me and said he wanted torah it slow! I was shocked and offended. Could he be telling the truth or was he not that into me?

ANSWER: Guys can't win. If we go fast, you think it's bad, and if we take it slow, you think it's bad. What the hell do you want from us?