Guy confessions: men admit to their dirtiest deeds and most shameless scams ever.

Nude and Rude

"When I got home one evening, I saw my roommate out in the backyard hitting golf balls. I went into the kitchen and rummaged around for something to eat. Then I heard a knock on the front door. I thought it was weird that he hadn't come in through the screen door in the back but decided to take advantage of the fact that he wouldn't be able to see me through the door. I stood in front of it, dropped my pants and boxers, unlocked the door, and yelled 'Come on in!' The door opened, and a woman selling Bibles peered in. Screaming when she saw my junk, she turned to run away while I quickly tried to pull up my pants. We haven't had any more visitors from the church."--Todd, 28

Sister Sellout

"My girlfriend and I took advantage of the fact that her parents were out of the house and had rowdy sex. I guess we forgot to lock the door, because her 10-year-old sister strolled into the room, saw what was going on, and screamed. We quickly got dressed, and my girlfriend ran after her and had a really serious talk about how important it was to keep her mouth shut about what she had seen. But that night, over dinner with my girlfriend's parents and grandparents, the little brat yelled 'Aaron and Kate were being loud and having sex!' Everyone ate the rest of the meal in silence."--Aaron, 22

[ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

Grab 'n'Oh!

"I was on a date with an incredibly attractive girl. We had a great dinner, and afterward, she proposed going back to her place. I was able to contain my excitement until she squeezed my inner thigh to signal it was time to go. At that point, my excitement grew into what I call a junior-high boner. Without a way to hide it, I grabbed my napkin and carried it over my crotch as we walked out of the restaurant. When we got outside, she noticed and reached down to pull it out of my hand. But instead, she grabbed the napkin and my hard-on. The rest of the night was awkward."--Dennis, 25