Ask him anything: advice from our guy guru, Jonathan Small.(LOVE AND LUST)(Column)

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[Q] The other night, my guy called me by the name another woman while we were in bed. When I got mad, he swore he didn't even know anyone by that name. My friends, all have different opinions, so tell me--how big a deal is that?

[A] There's no doubt it's a warning sign--and an insensitive thing for him to have done--but just because he shouted the wrong name, it doesn't mean he's sneaking around behind your back.

For one thing, he could have just had a mental lapse. During sex, guys' brains power down to the level of a monkey--a stupid monkey--so blurting out a random name by accident is hardly outside the realm of possibility. Or maybe he was fantasizing about a celebrity or the new girl in the accounting department. It may not be something you're thrilled about, but it's definitely not cheating either.

Lastly, yes, he may be sleeping with someone else. But until you have other reasons to be suspicious, you're just going to have to take him at his word. In the meantime, concentrate on making more eye contact in the sack (don't let him always bury his head in your neck during missionary), teasingly call him George or Brad when you're at the store or watching TV, and make him take you out to dinner as an apology.

(PICKUP SCHTICK)

[Q] My friends all seem to have pickup tricks to start conversations with guys, and I read about them too--even in Cosmo. But I don't really feel like they're my style. Would a guy really not respond well if I just went up to him and said "Hey, what's up?"