The truth about hooking up: never been on an actual date? You're not alone. For many women today, no-strings relationships (and sex) are de rigueur--but they have pitfalls.(REAL-LIFE READS)

We live in a casual culture today. Many people wear jeans to work, texting is "almost as common as calling, and hooking up has made traditional dating an endangered activity. In fact, many women, especially those in college, now feel that no-strings-attached relationships are their one and only option. "Hooking up has replaced dating as the primary form of male-female socializing on campuses these days," says Donna Freitas, PhD, author of Sex and the Soul. "So people feel if they want physical intimacy and affection, they have no choice but to partake--even if what they really want is a committed relationship."

Which, it turns out, is exactly what most women are hoping for. A Cosmo poll found that 73 percent of chicks wished dating was more common. With that in mind, we decided to look at what spurred the hookup craze, the pros and cons of nonexclusive relationships, and what you can do to bring dating back from the dead.

WHY HOOKING UP HAS TAKEN HOLD

The term hooking up has been around since the '80s, but a few recent cultural shifts have kicked the practice into high gear. For one, women in their early 20s are focusing more on their jobs than on husband hunting. Now that it's socially acceptable to many 'later, the ring-by-spring hysteria that used to consume college seniors no longer exists.

And with about 60 women to every 40 men on the average college campus these days, the chances of pairing off aren't great anyway. "Women feel there are so few men to go around that they can't demand much from them," says Kathleen Bogle, PhD, author of Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus. "Guys, on the other hand, feel like kids ha a candy store--with so many women to choose from, they're hesitant to settle on just one. Those who want relationships often don't pursue them because they'll get teased by their friends for it. There's pressure to live up to that phrase 'Bros before hos."

Adding to this phenomenon are shows like Sex and the City and Gossip Girt, which Beth Paul, PhD, professor of psychology at the College of New Jersey, says glamorize casual sex and present it as the norm.

But what's made hooking up reach the tipping point is technology. "Hooking up existed before cell phones and e-mail, but back then, it required advanced thought--you had to call someone before going out to ensure you'd be able to meet up with them later," says Bogle. But with text messaging, IM, and Twitter, "last-minute plans are possible ... not to mention far less awkward.