How to reconnect after a fight: following a blowout, there's an abyss of awkwardness between you and him. Get back on solid ground this way.(LOVE AND LUST)

* What's more nerve-wracking than a knock-down, drag-out with your guy? The hours or days after you've made up but before you're back to your usual level of closeness. Though no longer actively pissed, you are uncomfortably detached from each other ... and worse, unsure how to get on track again.

One thing you can't count on: his taking the reconnecting reins. "Women have higher levels of estrogen and oxytocin, hormones that promote bonding," says John C. Friel, PhD, coauthor of The 7 Best Things (Happy) Couples Do, "so they're more likely to try to repair the relationship." Here, some advice for speeding past the awkward stage.

Zip Your Lips

If the postquarrel chill has him saying little besides "Please pass the salt," your instinct may be to sit him down for a talk about why he's not talking. Resist--he's not up for another heavy discussion.

Instead, do something fun with him. Hit a hiking trail, explore a nearby town, or dance in the living room. "The activity draws your attention away from the fight," explains Friel, and will get you chatting naturally. Then say, "Hey, I'm sorry we had a spat. I hate arguing with you." The key: "Keep it short," says Allen Berger, PhD, author of Love Secrets Revealed. If there are lingering unresolved issues, bring them up later.

Suck Up

If (and only if) the fight was truly your fault, help mend things with a small gift or treat. Pick up the latest issue of his lave magazine or a pint of ice cream you know he'll devour. "Since guys are action oriented, showing him you feel bad can be more powerful than saying it," says Alan Fruzzetti, PhD, author of ...