THE 24 HOURS OF LEMONS; Not rich enough or smart enough for `real' racing? This is the race for you.(Motorsports)

Byline: DAVE COLEMAN

Carburetors are confusing. Were this not so, we might have arrived at the track slightly better prepared. We might, in other words, have driven our race car in third gear before the start.

Not that we hadn't tried. We had the car running and driving a full week before the race. We had borrowed a truck from one friend, a trailer from another, and taken, collectively, 24 man-hours of productivity away from our employers in an attempt to do an honest, weekday shakedown run. But it was only after working until 3 a.m., getting up at 6, and driving four hours to the track that we realized our carburetors were jetted for our driveway and would have to be re-jetted for the racetrack.

This is difficult when you don't have any jets, don't know what a jet looks like and wouldn't know where to stick a jet even if you had one. So instead of re-jetting, we removed and reinstalled the timing belt three or four times, hit the fuel pump with a rock and finally went home and took a nap.

This was fate telling us not to cheat.

One would think that in a race with only one rule, there would be sufficient creative freedom to avoid the cheating urge, but our creativity knows no bounds. In spite of attracting competitors who clearly aren't, the race itself is quite brilliant. The race is called 24 Hours of LeMons (and billed as the "first annual''), and the only rule of any consequence states each car must be purchased and race-prepped (not counting safety gear) for less than $500.

If you've ever raced unprofessionally, you know the single greatest deterrent to having fun in a race car is the nagging fear of bending something expensive. Pack a racetrack with crap cans, it stands to reason, and you should instantly have the most enjoyable form of motorsport yet invented.