Men admit to their dirtiest deeds and most shameless scams ever.(GUY CONFESSIONS)

Beep Beep, Bye-Bye

"When I found out my girlfriend had been cheating on me, I immediately broke up with her. A month later, she called me, begging for forgiveness, and wanted to rekindle our romance. We decided to meet for dinner. When we got to the restaurant, I told her I would drop her off in front so she wouldn't have to walk far in tier heels and I would park the car and meet her inside. Instead of parking, I went home and watched a baseball game on TV. I never heard from her again."--Kevin, 27

Meatball Meltdown

"I was psyched to be going on a first date with this girl Alexa. As I was leaving, I tripped and fell into the fence that surrounds my house. It cut my stomach pretty badly, so I ran back upstairs to clean the wound. My roommate thought I should cancel, but I refused. I picked up Alexa, and we went to dinner. The next thing I remember is waking up in an ambulance and freaking out because my shirt was drenched in red goo. I felt like an idiot when Alexa said it wasn't blood ... it was marinara sauce. Evidently, at the restaurant I had gone into shock from the cut and passed out in my plate of spaghetti."--Jason, 24

May I Ass-ist You?

"After college, I got a job assisting an executive at an advertising firm. The guy was a complete rat and always had me doing things that were not in my job description, like lying to his wife while he was with his girlfriend. One night, his surprisingly attractive wife showed up looking for him. I think she knew her husband was cheating because she was totally flirting with me. We ended up having sex in his office and continued to do so for a few months. My boss eventually gave me a raise because he said I was doing a great job handling his affairs."--Derek, 25

Spanks for Nothing!