Generation X fathers strive for harmony.

Byline: Cindy Krischer Goodman

MIAMI _ On most workdays, a dad somewhere is bolting from his office, yanking off his necktie and slipping into a coach's shirt just in time to deliver instructions to his child's soccer or baseball team.

Juggling roles as a business executive, father and coach is all in a day's work for men of Generation X. These new dads with new priorities represent a broad shift from prior generations in their level of involvement with their kids. And that involvement reflects in the workplace: They are more likely to sacrifice pay, modify work travel and refuse relocation for family reasons.

Now some employers are reaching out to help men with balance, considering them the silent stakeholder in the work/life debate. But those employers who try often are baffled by the results: The men are shunning benefits offered to them or reluctant to talk openly about work-family conflict, often out of fear of being perceived as weak in their commitment to work.

"Men still feel awkward about taking paternity leave or asking for flexible work arrangements," Maria Ferris, director of workforce diversity programs at IBM, said at a recent conference sponsored by the Alliance for Work-Life Progress. The computer giant offers two weeks of paid time off to new fathers, but "men are not using it as much as we would like."

At the same time, fathers of Generation X _ the 60 million Americans between ages 25 and 40 _ spend at least an hour a day more involved in their child's lives than the prior generation.

Jason Murray, a shareholder at the Miami law firm Carlton Fields, says he changed his work habits since becoming a father 13 months ago. Murray says he makes an effort to be highly productive at his job as a franchise attorney so he can leave in time to have dinner, shed his suit and become a playmate to his son, Jason.