OPINION: BEALE ON ... STELLA ARTOIS.

Apparently the monks of 14th century Belgium managed to convince themselves that beer was 'liquid bread'. Surely the best example of brand positioning ever alighted upon in the lager market, this nifty bit of packaging allowed the monks to happily brew gallons of the stuff for quaffing on fasting days. And your average monastic detox passed in a fug of cheeriness.

Perhaps the 14th century Belgian slapheads might find something familiar, then, in the latest Stella Artois print campaign. The ads have something of a detox theme themselves, so appropriate for this time of year when so many self-abusers turn smug, humourless body-is-a-temple-for-31-days abstainers.

Stella, as you'll know, has this rhythm going about being a bit pricey, a bit classy and bugger all those other trappings that you might otherwise covet - such as the Eames chair showing the scars of being used to open a bottle of Stella, from last year's award-winning press campaign.

So in this latest series of ads from Lowe you find a tin of Beluga fed to the cat, a whole Parma ham in a bin, the tail of a fish sticking out of the waste disposal. All have been junked to accommodate the new Stella Artois barrel: 'Make room in your fridge.'

The new draught barrel has been performing pretty well since launch, selling more than 250,000 units and generating take-home sales of more than pounds 3 million last year. Stella overall had a great year, with sales up 22 per cent to more than pounds 400 million and selling more than twice its nearest rival, Carling. All this despite the fact that in blind taste tests Stella often comes out poorly. That's the power of positioning.

Now, it's more than 20 years since Stella adopted the 'reassuringly expensive' tag. As a positioning, being a bit pricey is a cheap trick You've only got to think about it for a moment to find it crass, insulting, overtly manipulative and toe-curlingly old-fashioned.

That it's worked so phenomenally well for Stella ...