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Character flawed. (Ask Cosmo Anything).

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| July 01, 2003 | Kurtz, Irma | COPYRIGHT 2003 Hearst Communications, reprinted with permission of Hearst. This material is published under license from the publisher through the Gale Group, Farmington Hills, Michigan. All inquiries regarding rights should be directed to the Gale Group. (Hide copyright information)Copyright

Every time my friend starts dating a new guy, her personality completely changes. If her boyfriend loves museums and theater, that's all she talks about. If the guy is into sports, suddenly she's an athlete. Recently, she's pretty much turned into a Southern belle because her boyfriend is from Georgia. I wish I could just laugh it off, but it really irks me. What can I do to get my friend back?

You can't get her back, because you never had her in the first place. How can someone be your friend if she doesn't know who she truly is? A person who dislikes herself so much that she changes personalities the way most of us change clothes cannot be a real friend because she's too confused about her true identity. Chances are, when she was between boyfriends in the past, she adopted your traits, your tastes, and your opinions. That didn't bother you so much, did it? Most people, including you and her boyfriends, tend to feel flattered when someone emulates them. (And ...

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