O, The Oprah Magazine articles from November 2004

O, The Oprah Magazine archives from November 2004

We hear you! Readers marvel at how smart women can make foolish choices, and applaud the talent and ferocity of Alicia Keys, the common sense of Amy Bloom, and more ....(letters)(Letter to the Editor)
November 1, 2004... I devoured Aimee Lee Ball's article "She's Come Undone" in your September issue. It amazed me that someone I've never met could so accurately describe my life. I was in an abusive relationship for almost three years, after being sucked in by a...

Let the holiday games begin!(here we go)(Brief Article)(Editorial)
November 1, 2004... I want exactly the same gift for you that I want for myself this year: a holiday season filled with more happiness than hurry. Can we really have it all--delicious meals, meaningful traditions, imaginative presents--and still have our wits...

The subject is faith.(Calendar)
November 1, 2004... November [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] [TABLE OMITTED] [TABLE OMITTED] [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] "Faith is what makes life bearable, with all its tragedies and ambiguities and sudden, startling joys." --Madeleine L'Engle

Dr. Phil: "part of maturing is realizing that you don't get to have it all"; Phillip C. McGraw, PhD, on considering a cross-country move ... healing a broken family ... and confronting an inconsiderate gift-giver.(tell it like it is)
November 1, 2004... Q I live on the West Coast with my husband and daughter. My only sister lives with her husband and two daughters on the East Coast. We love our life here, but I can't help wanting to be closer to my sister and see our children grow up together....

Suze Orman: "friendship is an emotional commitment, not a financial one"; Buying a home with a friend ... investment strategies for a down market ... cleaning up a parent's credit mistake.(financial freedom)
November 1, 2004... Q I'm planning to buy a house with a good friend I've known for 15 years. We're both 28 years old. What logistics should we take care of before signing a contract? [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] A I know how hard it is for a single person to...

Something to think about.(Brief Article)
November 1, 2004... IT'S INTENSELY HUMAN TO TRUST IN SOMETHING LARGER THAN OUR PERSONAL CONCERNS AND FINITE SELVES. AROUND THE HOLIDAYS--AND AT OTHER STRESSFUL TIMES--QUESTIONS OF FAITH OFTEN LOOM LARGER. FIND A QUIET SPOT TO CONSIDER THE FOLLOWING: 1 Which...

Things that make you go aaiiieeee! The printer dies. The elevator stalls. The bottom falls out of the blender. Some people can stay calm and deal coolly with everyday disasters. Betsy Carter wasn't one of them--until she learned the life-altering secrets of equilibrium.(healing)
November 1, 2004... ONE AFTERNOON WHEN I WAS BARELY 6, I was watching my favorite television show, Rootie Kazootie. As the credits rolled at the end of the half hour, an adult voice came on and said that we had just seen the end of poor Rootie; the show had been...

Found in translation: all alone in Japan for a week? Hai! (That means "yes.") Seven days later, her shyness had turned to gumption and her confusion to calm--and even her maid kind of liked her.(tales of adventure)
November 1, 2004... JAPAN IS ONE COUNTRY YOU CAN'T do alone--everyone said so. You can't read street signs; you might get lost for days. You can't read menus; you could starve unless you want to point all the time. And the people are formal, even cold, I'd heard....

The White House; It was a terrific property. Really. But for one thing: an old woman's casually tossed-off words that continue to rattle ZZ Packer's imagination.(coming of age)
November 1, 2004... WHENEVER WE WENT TO LOOK at a house, my mother and father talked with the real estate agent or rapped the walls to check for soundness or discussed termite reports while I--5 years old at the time--was bored out of my mind. My parents had moved...

Modern-day Rosie: she steps up. She commits. She leads.
November 1, 2004... You know Rosie, the 1940s icon, with her shirtsleeves rolled up and the "can do" attitude. She took over the jobs the men left behind as they headed off to war. And she never really gave them back. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] But that's...

The O list.
November 1, 2004... "A few things I think are just great."--OPRAH Baby, It's Cold Outside! "If you'll be having a white Christmas, you'll be wanting these blue shearling snow boots to pull you through in style." ($85, Tommy Hilfiger; 888-TOMM[Y.sub.4]U)...

The little red dress; O's answer to the little black dress: a great red one. From fire-engine to burgundy, this color can introduce the shyest soul to her inner partygoer. Eight women find the right brights.(fashion)
November 1, 2004... COLLEEN SAIDMAN Yoga teacher, 45 Seeing red: In yoga it's the color of the root chakra (energy center): "Wearing it means you're not afraid or trying to disappear." Colleen also likes taking it home. "I have a red sofa, red silk...

Into the wild: sleek leopards and amazing zebras (totally faux, of course) lend their glamorous patterns to bags and shoes and gloves. It's an easy way to give a little bite to your tamest basics.(KEY PIECE)
November 1, 2004... ANIMAL RIGHTS Fierce prints look best in small doses. Animal wrongs? When accessories are this sexy, clothes shouldn't be. 1. Tawny gloves spotlight the plainest coat. Celine, $350. 2. Stripes and spots coexist chicly on tall boots. Will's...

Stretching: the truth; Pre-exercise warm-ups may cause more harm than good.(body wise)(Brief Article)
November 1, 2004... WISDOM IMMORTALIZED IN COUNTless workout tapes and aerobics classes says that limbering up before you exercise helps prevent soreness and injury, but scientists have had a hard time proving it. Epidemiologist Stephen B. Thacker, MD, and his...

[love] your heart: ten women heart doctors on what they do to stay healthy.(body wise)
November 1, 2004... Seeing a physician take a drag on a cigarette and then order a Big Mac would set cardiologist Ingela Schnittger's teeth on edge. She firmly believes in living, eating, and exercising by example: "All doctors should," she says. "It's our...

Fast food for thought: how the calories add up.(body wise)(Brief Article)
November 1, 2004... "LITE" SALADS AND and sandwiches notwithstanding, a recent study in the Journal of the American College of Nutrition showed that including a fast food meal in your diet can increase daily intake by more than 200 calories. The study's authors...

The way to eat: juicy news for the fructose intolerant ... psyching up to slim down ... and the dubious allure of blue-green algae. David L. Katz, MD, serves up nutritional savvy.(body wise)
November 1, 2004... Q I am fructose intolerant, which basically means I am allergic to fruit unless it's cooked (and even then, I can eat only certain kinds). Do you have any advice so I don't miss out on essential nutrients? --SHARON WEBB, BALTIMORE The...

20 things you'd never think would make you fat (but guess what?): why are you packing on pounds if you're avoiding fats, drinking smoothies, and using artificial sweeteners? Exactly, says Elizabeth Svoboda.(WEIGHT)
November 1, 2004... FOOD AND EXERCISE AREN'T THE whole diet story. A slew of stealthy, often surprising weight gain culprits could be causing the scale to creep upward. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Carb-free liquor. An increasing number of purveyors of...

Refresher course: in the midst of all the seasonal feasting, you're going to be really grateful for a meal as light and healthy as chef Rori Trovato's delicious poached salmon.(VERY FAST, VERY EASY)
November 1, 2004... SURE, LIFE'S A BANQUET, BUT EVERY meal can't be one. Although we're abundantly thankful for fancy dishes like maple-glazed whole duck (see "Duck! Here Comes Thanksgiving," page 242), after a while the holidays can feel like one long marathon...

Oprah and the really, really good sandwich.(food)
November 1, 2004... It was a miracle on rye--no, make that on homemade white pepper-Jack bread. It wasn't just the curried chicken sandwich that bowled Oprah over but a local California cook, a quirky cafe--and a chance opportunity to help keep some local home...

Deck your halls: dreamed up by top interior designers, these simple, inexpensive centerpieces--from candles to cranberries--are a fresh way to make your house say party.(comfort zone)
November 1, 2004... OUT OF THE WOODS and onto your table: velvety moss, rustic-looking candlesticks, whimsical flora-and-fauna china. Decorator Brian McCarthy, an aficionado of vintage accessories, suggests bowls of mercury glass (glass with a silvery coating on...

Look what we found! The plushest eye palettes, a lipstick with options, and more. Here's what O's beauty editors--Valerie Monroe and Jolene Edgar--fell in love with this month.(beauty)(Product/Service Evaluation)
November 1, 2004... ARE YOUR EYES so wide and bright they seem to shine like jewels? Neither are ours, friends, after a long day at the office and a couple of holiday-related events lasting late into the evening. But we don't care, not one bit, because these...

Ask Val: so many lotions, so little time! O's beauty director, Valerie Monroe, guides you through the dizzying choices awaiting you in the moisturizing aisle.(beauty)(Brief Article)(Product/Service Evaluation)
November 1, 2004... Q: Do I really need a wardrobe of body moisturizers--a different one for my neck, my hands, my heels? And will I get a better one if I spend more money? [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] A: Funny you should ask. Just a couple of days ago, as I...

The two-apartment marriage: separate bedrooms are one thing, but separate addresses? Is this maybe giving each other too much space? Or can living apart keep you together? Come to think of it, why get married at all? New bride Valerie Frankel fields all your questions.(couples)
November 1, 2004... I GOT MARRIED! IT WAS A SMALL ceremony at my parents' farm in Vermont. Just family. My daughters were both flower girls and bridesmaidens. My groom played a love song for me on the French horn. We went to Maine for a brief honeymoon, then drove...

The road warriors: they don't want to play with dolls or read about charming French orphans. They want to dig, blast, shovel, detonate, and steamroll! No one told Lisa Wolfe that having sons would put her on a collision course with her own feminist expectations.(family)
November 1, 2004... "CAN WE BUILD A ROAD?" "Can we build a rooooad?" "Can we build a road?" [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] A 3-year-old will try anything. My son Nico is changing the intonation of the question so I might forget I heard it ten minutes...

When a parent dies: it's always a shock. But grieving grown-up children may be surprised to find that despite the sorrow, the life changes following loss are often positive. Le Anne Schreiber offers a fresh look at a rite of passage.(family)
November 1, 2004... FROM AS EARLY AS I CAN REMEMBER, I LOOKED AHEAD to certain events that would usher me into the status I first called big girl and later called all grown-up--the first day of school, the mastery of long division, the first bra, the first date,...

Kiss, kiss.(reading room)
November 1, 2004... With his shamelessly snooty soirees at Spago, the late Swifty Lazar made Oscar night the hottest ticket in Hollywood. Now the brash and the beautiful vie for invitations to Vanity Fair's stellar party at Morton's. In their OSCAR NIGHT FROM THE...

Between freedom and love: masterful stories from the incomparable Alice Munro.(reading room)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... PASSING BEFORE US OVER THE LAST 40 years has been a generation of short-story writers equal to any in the English language--V.S. Pritchett, William Trevor, William Maxwell, John Updike, and perhaps the finest of them all, Alice Munro. Though...

Hands-on memories.(reading room)(Brief Article)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... Zora Neale Hurston, the charismatic African-American writer, folklorist, and theatrical performer, fervently believed the dead could live again. Her niece Lucy Anne Hurston, aided by the estate of Zora Neale Hurston, proves her aunt right in...

Create! Provoke!(reading room)(Brief Article)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... The raw, grieving imagery of Guernica, Pablo Picasso's 1937 masterpiece protesting the atrocities of the Spanish Civil War, still sears our imaginations. In this excerpt from Guernica: The Biography of a Twentieth-Century Icon (Bloomsbury), art...

Oh, behave! Two mannerly classics tell us how to write, chew, chat, smoke, drink, and e-mail with grace, charm, and confidence.(reading room)(Book Review)(Brief Review)
November 1, 2004... DO YOU KNOW THE TIDIEST WAY TO EAT A QUESADILLA? HOW to address a wedding invitation? How not to drive other people to homicide with your Shakespearean-length cell-phone monologues? In the richly encyclopedic 17th edition of Emily Post's...

He touched me: can a great work of art change your life? Twenty-eight writers tell what Proust did for them.(reading room)(Brief Article)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... THOUGH MARCEL PROUST'S MASTERPIECE, In Search of Lost Time, is thousands of pages and seven volumes long, reading it always feels astonishingly intimate and personal. As the novel sweeps majestically through its narrator's childhood and the...

Liars in love: an enthralling novel of desire, deception, and trust.(reading room)(Brief Article)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... I've always admired Margot Livesey's remarkable skill with domestic life, the ease with which she conjures up a world, peoples it with characters who feel oddly familiar, and yet escapes the mundane through the sheer brilliance of her...

Biblio: recommendations from our shelf to yours.(reading room)(Brief Article)(Book Review)
November 1, 2004... * You can't live in the past, but sometimes you have to go there. In John Updike's eloquent, erotic new novel, Villages (Knopf), Owen Mackenzie, an aging, retired software entrepreneur, relives his sexual education--from his titillating...

Books that made a difference to Anita Shreve: terse, wrenching short stories, a powerful American drama, and an Australian gem are on the novelist's "you absolutely have to read this!" list.(reading room)
November 1, 2004... "I JUST READ A FABULOUS BOOK." [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] I adore this sentence, because I know I'm about to be told of a book that so excited the reader that he or she can't wait to share the news. If the recommendation is from a person I...

Rescuing the world's girls, Part 2: the garden of evil.(special report)
November 1, 2004... Their bodies are cheap currency in Cambodia, where girls--many of them under 16--turn tricks for pennies, often with dozens of men a night. Why is this still going on? Blame poverty, blame corruption, blame a society that views women as a...

61 days of holiday sanity.
November 1, 2004... Are you looking forward to the season ahead? With shivers of anticipation? Or just shivers? We can't reach out and put a finger on the bow, uncork the wine, or tuck you in for a well-earned nap, but we can get you organized (just follow our...

Duck! Here comes Thanksgiving.
November 1, 2004... Maybe it isn't the tryptophan in the turkey that puts you to sleep every year--maybe it's the same-old sameness of the menu. Give thanks, then, for chef Govind Armstrong's variations on a feast: The noble bird is a maple-glazed duck, the...

Oprah talks to Barack Obama.(THE O INTERVIEW)(Interview)
November 1, 2004... The riveting young Illinois state senator who brought the house down at the Democratic National Convention (people are still talking about him) takes a rare break from his 16-hour workday to tell Oprah about his multicultural upbringing, his...

American original.(Millicent Rogers set the style for frontier jewelry and fashion)
November 1, 2004... Prairie skirts and cowboy boots. Blanket shawls and turquoise jewelry. This season's mix of frontier classics and indigenous crafts is the legacy of forties style icon Millicent Rogers, an East Coast trendsetter turned Taos jewelrymaker and...

If your skin could talk ...
November 1, 2004... "Put out that cigarette!" "No! Not a tanning bed!" "Can't we please go to sleep now?" Is this your conscience speaking? No, it's your skin. And if you pay attention, it can tell you what it wants and what you should do for it at every age....

Breathing space.(Illustration)
November 1, 2004... Stand at the edge of this pristine lake in Maryland's Black Hills Regional Park, and listen to the fall breeze rustle through the brilliant crimson and gold canopy. PHOTOGRAPH BY BRIAN G. GREEN

Heart to heart: the transplant connection.
November 1, 2004... A young father is fatally shot, but his heart beats on in an older man's body. A teenage girl dies in a car crash, and four people get to live as a result. Are they grateful? Yes. Do they want to meet the donor's family? That's where it gets...

"It was worth taking a risk to save a life": of course you'd offer a kidney to a dying loved one--but to a perfect stranger? Two remarkably good Samaritans who gave freely of themselves explain.
November 1, 2004... There's admirable generosity, as in writing a fat check. And then there's Olympian generosity--for example, the almost unfathomable gift of one of your vital body parts to a total stranger. And yet according to the United Network for Organ...

Best of the west: grab a cowhide bag, corral some turquoise, and stride into Southwest style (check out "American Original," page 252)--it's riding high.(Fashion)(Brief Article)(Buyers Guide)
November 1, 2004... Home on the range turns sleek and minimalist with this envelope clutch. The colors are a naturally good mix. Cara Landy, $265. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Rock your wrist with beautifully striated stones--the gold toggle closing has a clean...

The shock of the neutral: a touch of caramel, a dash of cream, a hit of chocolate--with a shot of shimmer as a chaser. Treat yourself to the most decadent (and wearable) polishes in seasons.(Beauty)(Brief Article)
November 1, 2004... 1. Essie in Poppie Cock ($8), a warm caramel mocha, is polish's answer to plush, as velvety as shearling or suede. We can't keep our hands off it--or it off our hands. 2. Amethyst mellowed by a cool silver cast, high-shine Lancome Vernis...

Duck! Here comes thanksgiving: ... accompanied by liqueur-spiked relish; Tart, smoky Brussels sprouts; And yams with homemade marshmallows (for story, see page 242).(THE RECIPES)
November 1, 2004... All recipes make 10 servings. For additional holiday recipes, visit oprah.com. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] French Beans with Roasted Figs, Thyme, and Rustic Croutons Croutons: 1 (16-ounce) loaf walnut-raisin bread, crust...

Shop guide (all prices are approximate).(Buyers Guide)
November 1, 2004... COVER/HERE WE GO P.41 Ralph Lauren Collection cashmere sweater, $998, wool skirt, $1,498, and silver and turquoise concha belt, $3,995, select Ralph Lauren stores and Saks Fifth Avenue. Kara Ross coral, turquoise, and diamond earrings, $6,600,...

"It's more fun to give than to receive".(what I know for sure)
November 1, 2004... SO NOW WE ENTER THE PROCLAIMED season of giving that stirs anxiety in the hearts of many. Feeling overwhelmed with holiday angst is accepted as the norm--but I guarantee it doesn't have to be that way, even if you have ten children and 55 other...