Esquire articles from June 2008

Esquire archives from June 2008

As if we'd give an unlikable guy five covers.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Letter to the editor)
June 1, 2008... For the profile accompanying George Clooney's fifth appearance on our cover, editor at large A.J. Jacobs showed the actor Web sites dedicated to him ("The 9:10 to Crazyland," April). He also shared a video that, thankfully, had nothing to do...

Nonfiction as fiction.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Letter to the editor)
June 1, 2008... After the sudden death of Heath Ledger, writer Lisa Taddeo set out to create a fictional self-portrait of the actor during his final days ("The Last Days of Heath Ledger," April). She explored his neighborhood and interviewed anyone she could...

There was no real consensus on how to react to April's stories about Health Ledger and Admiral William Fallon.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)
June 1, 2008... There was no real consensus on how to react to April's stories about Health Ledger and Admiral William Fallon. But then we showed George Clooney a sorbid video. Nobody felt good about that one. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED]

Context-free highlight from a letter we won't be running.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)
June 1, 2008... "Remember, you're not stuck in a Thai prison, alone and hungry."

An untimely exit.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Letter to the editor)
June 1, 2008... Also in the April issue, former Naval War College professor and Esquire contributing editor Thomas P. M. Barnett wrote about Admiral William "Fox" Fallon, the now-former head of U.S. Central Command, who was responsible for military strategy...

Clothes for tall people and yet another reason to own more than one belt.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Letter to the editor)
June 1, 2008... I am six foot nine (4) and wear a size 18 shoe, which means I can't shop in regular stores and am rarely able to try things on. Unfortunately, I am not blessed with an NBA player's bankroll, so custom suits are out of the question. What can I...

What they're wearing in the movies.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... I have an idea for a feature. I'm constantly trying to track down clothing worn in movies, particularly action movies. Maybe you guys could do something on how actors dress for their roles. Surely people would be interested to learn how...

The reaction meter: "the last days of Heath Ledger".(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Lisa Taddeo's fictional re-creation of Heath Ledger's final week really riled people. Although we called the story reported fiction, if turns out you had other names for it. And some of them were kind of mean. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] ...

What lies beneath.(EDITOR'S LETTERS)(Editorial)
June 1, 2008... THIS OBAMA THING. Jay-zus. Twenty-two thousand people show up in State College, Pennsylvania, to hear him give a speech. This wasn't the first time, of course. Are you starting to get the sense that there really is something happening here? ...

Elsewhere in the bin.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Letter to the editor)
June 1, 2008... I am a big fan of your style advice, but a recent comment in your March issue put me off. You mentioned "white, pasty kneecaps, as far as the eye can see" as a sign of spring's arrival (Man at His Best). Not all your readers have this problem....

Back story: what I've learned.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Interview)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] After interviewing Gore Vidal (What I've Learned, page 132), writer at large Mike Sager e-mailed us an account of the meeting. Sager's note, which was not intended for publication, is below. He had bed head--his...

The new best bars in the world.(This Way In: THE SOUND & THE FURY)(Table)
June 1, 2008... THE NEW BEST BARS IN THE WORLD This month's issue includes the third annual "Esquire's Best Bars in America" (page 87). To honor such an occasion, we asked our drinks writer, David Wondtich, to update one of our first lists of...

The vocabulary.(Man at His Best)
June 1, 2008... (Terms and ideas you will encounter in the pages that follow. Great for conversation.) [FIGURE 1 OMITTED] * OBLIVIOUS ABSORPTION n: The uptake into your body of chemicals found in everyday medicines and grooming products, like sodium...

Are you getting this? The shameless showmanship of Surfwise.(Film)(Movie review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] You're more interested in Doug Pray's fascinating new documentary Surfwise than you think you are--unless you actually yearn to see yet another Endless Summer montage of carefree dudes conquering mammoth waves. Not...

The underrated oeuvre: Ray Winstone.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Before Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, the 51-year-old Ray Winstone brought pugnacious charm to smaller parts in A-list prestige pics like The Departed and Cold Mountain. He was even digitally...

The hall of cultural significance: the six most intriguing performances this month.(Man at His Best: The Culture)
June 1, 2008... ACTRESS WHOSE NAME WE JUST MEMORIZED [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Billle Piper in Showtime's Secret Diary of a Call Girl. Introducing the television show least likely to be TiVo'ed by Eliot Spitzer. Call Girl is already a hit in the UK, and...

The rules.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Rule No. 763: If on your journey you encounter a Mexican woman selling tamales out of an Igloo cooler, buy some. Rule No. 779: In descending order of quality: "Greatest Hits," "Best of," "Very Best of," "The Singles," "Ultimate Collection."...

This month in advertising.(Man at His Best: The Culture)
June 1, 2008... As a graphic designer, Shepard Fairey has helped market some of the biggest names around: Nike, Zeppelin, Guitar Hero. And with his new book, E Pluribus Venom (Gingko Press, $30), Fairey has taken to branding America's great national...

Drink like a novelist.(Books)(Everyday Drinking )(Brief article)(Book review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] KINGSLEY AMS'S drink writing is better than anybody else's, ever--even though there wasn't a single cocktail or category of booze he could write about without making a grievous factual error. No matter. Because...

Two dudes from the West.(Books)(George W. Bush in Harry Reid's "The Good Fight")(Brief article)(Book review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] In his new memoir, The Good Fight--written with Esquire executive editor Mark Warren and published by Putnam in May--Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, of Nevada, vividly describes his contentious relationship with...

All-adjective reviews: debut fiction.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(The Boat)(The End)(Brief article)(Book review)
June 1, 2008... THE BOAT (Knopf, $23), short stories by Nam Le. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Leering. Sepia-toned. Dark. Dark. Dark. Dark. Might. Well-crafted. Intricately cut, sanded, seamed, and stained. Striking. Aggressively schizophrenic. Crayolaesque...

Soundtrack to this issue: go back to the cover, begin music, start flipping. This story will cost you $6.93.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(Sound recording review)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... "The Arm," Islands The perfect balance of cinematic and hummable. Smaller than Arcade Fire, islands summons up a similarly powerful racket. (This Way in) [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] "Your New Man," Mason Jennings Part talking...

Will you ever run for president?(Man at His Best: The Culture)
June 1, 2008... 1. Your town is on fire. What do you do? (a) Grab the dog and get the hell out! (-3) (b)Watch it on the news while continuing to study for my law degree. (3) (c) Stand on the nearest fire truck and promise to catch Osama. (10) ...

What the f%$# is wrong with you people? Candid responses to a perplexing reality--from an expert and a comedian.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] MAJOR HUMAN FLAW: Some people talk on their cell phones at the movies. RESPONSE NO. 1, by Rich Ling, sociologist and author of New Tech, New Ties: How Mobile Communication is Reshaping Social Cohesion: There's a...

Funny * joke from a beautiful woman.(Man at His Best: The Culture)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... WHAT A WOMAN SAYS: "This place is a mess! C'mon, you and I need to clean up. Your stuff is lying on the floor, and you'll have no clothes to wear if we don't do laundry right now!" WHAT A MAN HEARS: "Blah, blah, blah, blah....

My medicine cabinet.(THE INVENTORY)
June 1, 2008... Well, it's not my medicine cabinet--I don't allow photographers into the sacred place where I floss, tweeze, and poop but it's a good facsimile. First thing you'll notice: It may look like yours. That's part of the point--it's nice to know that...

Ask a landscaper.(Gardening for Men)
June 1, 2008... I just bought a really big grill, and I want to have people over to barbecue. I want to make my yard look good, maybe even interesting. Ideas? 1) Plant annuals. As in flowers. Annuals give you a huge shot of color. Ask the nursery for ones...

Tool of the month.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)(Japanese knife, hori hori)(Product/service evaluation)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... * The hori hori: a Japanese utility knife. It's a concave, razor-sharp, seven-inch stainless-steel blade that digs, cuts roots, and has a measurement gauge right on it. Makes planting pansies a lot more satisfying. ($35; wildflower-seed.com)...

Minor catastrophe No. 221: People hate your steaks.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Consultant: Steve Greer, chef and owner of the Golden Ox in Kansas City, Missouri [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] {1} Use hardwood charcoal: It burns hotter. And wait until the flames have died down before cooking; you want to sear the...

The Barry[TM].(The Digital Man)(Product/service evaluation)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Having just tested two great laptop bodies and one great operating system, I'd be in heaven if I were the Dr. Frankenstein of computing. I'd combine the body of one and the brain of the other into the ultimate...

Shredding for the soul.(THE SUGGESTION)(paper shredders)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... THERE WAS A TIME when I didn't much worry about identity theft. If a thief was unlucky enough to take on my mountain of debt, the joke was on him. Eventually, though, I had something to lose (not much, but something), and since my identity...

The rules.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Rule No. 902: Be skeptical of the man with memorable hair. Rule No. 941: Every immigrant who ever made something of himself in America had $20 in his pocket when he got here. Rule No. 967: Recumbent bicyclists always look smug.

Minor catastrophe No. 243: your cooler's too small.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Consultant: Pableaux Johnson, author of Gameday Gourmet [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] {1} First, chill everything overnight. Stuff that starts cold has a better chance of staying cold. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] {2} Cover the...

Big breakfasts, dinner dates, fish & the dishes: Esquire's Answer Fella believes that there are no stupid questions, just stupid people who don't ask questions, fearing they'll look stupid. So ask Answer Fella anything. If he doesn't know the answer, he'll find out who does or who has a guess that sounds right.(Answer Fella)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Why is the word synonymous with a huge breakfast? I get that I'm supposed to be reminded of a massive, ax-wielding man fueled by large portions of food, but why no Bricklayer's Brunch? Sadly, the origin of the...

Sex.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)
June 1, 2008... I've been with my girlfriend for four months. Everything was perfect until she wanted to change foreplay. What does she mean by rough"? I feel frustrated and lost. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] There is nothing wrong with the way you do...

Minor catastrophe No. 317: your small catch looks even smaller in pictures.(Man at His Best: The Instructions)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] {1} Take your fish and hold it horizontally across your body with both hands. You'll do less I damage to its internal organs than if you hold it vertically. [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] {2} Extend your...

The Esquire guide to denim.(Man at His Best: Style)(Buyers guide)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] EVERYONE HAS that one pair. You may own others, stacked yea high ill a drawer in so many shades of blue, but when jeans are an option, you probably head straight for that one pair. They damn well better fit. They...

Four pairs, four prices: what to expect when you're spending ...(THE ESQUIRE GUIDE to DENIM)(Buyers guide)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] $50 WHAT YOU'RE GETTING: Denim that's been hand-rubbed, distressed with sand, and machine washed with enzymes and other dyes. WHAT YOU'RE NOT: Since their straight fit has been designed to accommodate a wide...

Three ways to wear it: because you can't go out in just jeans.(THE ESQUIRE GUIDE to DENIM)(Buyers guide)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] 1. WITH CASUAL CLOTHES Since darker denim tends to look more formal, loosen up with a pair of lighter blue jeans. Add patterns and colors as needed and try keeping that shirt tucked in. Two-button...

The endorsement: the unadorned back pocket.(Man at His Best: Style)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] A MAN IN THE MARKET for a fresh pair of blue jeans will encounter three categories of peculiar modern-day embellishments: 1) manufactured scuffs, 2) prewrinkled zones at the top of the thighs and behind the knees,...

You'd make a good president: or maybe a good fashion photographer, or a good shortstop. The point is, you have no idea.(chuck klosterman's: AMERICA)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Last February, I stumbled across a short news story that--at first glance--seemed only mildly entertaining and mostly innocuous. It was only interesting because it was weird. But I can't stop thinking about this...

New music from Iraq.(Chuck Klosterman's AMERICA)(Heavy Metal in Baghdad)(Brief article)(Video recording review)
June 1, 2008... If there was ever a country where metal music was designed to flourish, it would be Iraq, a place where actual metal regularly falls from the sky. This, however, is not the case. The documentary film Heavy Metal in Baghdad (on DVD this month)...

10 things you don't know about women.(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] 1. Women are interested in A-list things: A designers, A vacations, A orgasms. 2. Wait, let me rephrase that so there's no confusion: multiple orgasms. 3. We want you to be true to yourselves. And to us. And...

Seventy-five years of storied history--in one easy page. This month: 1968: marked by two assassinations and an escalation in Vietnam, 1968 was a brutal and historic year. We just did our best to sort it all out.(75 Page)(Calendar)
June 1, 2008... JUNE S: ROBERT F. KENNEDY ASSASSINATION Surely the most perfect comment on the whole episode was a small newspaper paragraph giving our Top Ten television programs for that week according to TAM ratings. This showed that The Saint and the...

What I learned looking for Steve Fossett: he set out to find the lost aviator. He didn't--no one has. But as he retraced Fossett's last moves, he learned a few things about the vast Nevada desert, like ...(essay)(Essay)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] IT'S NOT A DESERT. The area Fossett probably went down in is a jumble of scrubland and forest and canyons and black-water lakes. It would have been hard to find him in that sort of terrain even if the searchers...

Best bars in America.(Our Taps Are Clean!)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Another round. Beer bars. Cocktail joints. Pubs with great food. Exceptional, harmonious, glorious places to drink As always, to add to the growing list, we asked a lot of friends, the most esteemed of whom is David...

You're having: The Vessel 75.(Vessel: SEATTLE)(Brief article)(Bar review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Vessel SEATTLE You're having: The Vessel 75 This is the kind of sleek, elegant, and utterly unsentimental space in which you expect to find everyone drinking vodka-and-tonics. Nope. For once, the cocktails are as...

How to drink alone.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] DON'T USE it as a warm-up. It's a prelude to nothing. Drinking alone must be an event unto itself. It's never about getting sloppy, or lucky, or even happy. Beginning and end, make it a choice. A gift, not an escape....

Wollensky Grill, New York City.(GREAT MOMENTS IN A BARTENDING)(Brief article)(Bar review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Wollensky Grill, New York City. Packed bar, as always. Packed with men. Patrick, a beautifully intolerant man, stands in front of a new arrival. Guy orders white wine. Patrick says nothing. Patrick slides the wine in...

The smoky bar (by a Nonsmoker).(THE ENDORSEMENT)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] I DON'T SMOKE. Never have. Never will. I believe everything I've ever heard about the dangers of cigarettes. But bars are supposed to be subversive. Uninhibited, noisy, smoky. This was the atmosphere that put you in...

A dive.(GREAT MOMENTS IN A BARTENDING)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... A dive, somewhere between Denver and Steamboat, dead on a Thursday afternoon. A band is in the back, doing a sound check. I order a White Russian. The bartender sniffs the milk carton and makes a face, says. "Hang on." He jogs out of the bar....

You're having: a duende cocktail.(Cantina: SAN FRANCISCO)(Brief article)(Bar review)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] San Francisco is sprouting a ton of new, interesting cocktail bars. Alembic, Elixir, and Rye-to name just three--are all doing very serious cocktails. Now, having this many good choices is like having no choice at...

You're having: a martini.(Veranda Bar at the hotel Figueroa: LOS ANGELES)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] You want a poolside cocktail in sunny L A. You don't want the bullshit Hollywood scene. So skip the Sunset Strip and head downtown, to the back of the 1920s-era, Moroccan-themed Hotel Figueroa. Fewer model-actresses,...

The suggestion: every once in a while, order for her.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... WE ORDERED for a woman last night. It was a business thing. We were at the bar, waiting for colleagues. Nice bar. She counldn't decide. Or maybe she wasn't sure she even wanted a drink. The bartender was tapping his foot, glancing at the other...

The Vegas Bar time machine.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Three bars. Three eras. One crawl. Starting with the present: 2008 Eyecandy Sound Lounge The tortured nomenclature is the first clue that this place is the epitome of This Very Moment. It's a raucous...

The safety drink.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... A SIGNIFICANT PART--three quarters? seven eighths?--of America's countless bars have everything you need to get a world-class drink except somebody who can make it. There's the booze, shining genially behind the bar. There's the ice, rattling...

Hinano Cafe, Venice, California.(GREAT MOMENTS IN BARTENDING)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Hinano Cafe, Venice, California. I went in for a drink by myself, and the bartender just served me my beers. That's it. He didn't try to find out if I was depressed so he could tell me jokes or take my solo status as an invitation to talk about...

Drinking and the weather.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Sunday 12 degrees, gusty winds, snow Hot Laphroaig toddy [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Monday 31 degrees, wintry mix Irish coffee [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Tuesday 58 degrees, fair ...

The complaint: hotel bar names.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... WE'RE IN THE ELEVATOR in the Atlanta Sheraton, and my friend says, "Meet you in the bar." He points to a happy-hour menu on the wall: "Fandangles." Fandangles? You're a huge hotel conglomerate with thousands of smart people in your employ,...

Paul Gustings of Tujague's.(GREAT MOMENTS IN BARTENDING)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Paul Gustings of Tujague's in New Orleans could be the crustiest bartender on earth. He's also one of the best. Here, as he recently told us over Sazeracs, is an example of why we think that: "People always ask me how come I'm not smiling. I...

You're having: whatever the bartender suggests.(PDT: NEW YORK CITY)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Once you get past the slightly gimmicky name (PDT = Please Don't Tell) and the more than slightly gimmicky phone-booth entrance, this cocktail bar that requires table reservations is the epitome of understated, twenty-first-century elegance....

Deeply hungover.(THE WORST MOMENT IN BARTENDING)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... Deeply hungover, I stood behind the bar at Clark's Ale House in Syracuse. I felt stupid. Slow. Around lunchtime, a guy came in and ordered a pint. I pulled it and placed it on his coaster. He took a sip, then swiveled to face the street,...

Oh, christ, we're losing our bar.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] WE'RE LOSING our bar in a month. The bar at San Domenico restaurant--softly lit. pink granite, straight out of 1986. It's moving from Central Park South at Columbus Circle to a no-doubt-better location downtown...

Esquire's ten favorite cocktails in bars.(Best Bars in America 2008)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... As Director of the Esquire Institute for Advanced Research in Mixology, I visit a considerable number of bars in the course of my duties. Here are the ten best drinks I had in them during the last year. 1. Fitty-fitty (gin, dry vermouth,...

The cynic and senator Obama: the cynic wants to believe. But far too much has happened, and inspiration is no longer enough. The cynic will need to be convinced.(Viewpoint essay)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] THE CYNIC KNOWS he'll never make Oshkosh. He took the wrong exit and went too far north, and now he has to double back. He gives up, finally, and turns down County Road S in central Wisconsin, looking for a place...

The new bigotry a primer: things have gotten better. Nobody can deny that. But hate crimes are up, race relations are souring, and the Speech of the Year brought identity politics back to the dinner table. Bigotry-real, perceived, and a mixture of the two-is thriving in America, and this is what it looks like.
June 1, 2008... Why We Hate [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Semantics, maybe, but for the sake of discussion, let's separate isms-racism, sexism, anti-Semitism, and such--from bigotry. Isms being the most antagonistic manifestation of prejudice: cross...

Radha: women we love: don't feel guilty about gawking at these photos of Aussie actress Radha Mitchell. She's picturing you naked, too.(Interview)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] She sits, smiles, introduces herself politely, then snatches the notes from my fingers, scanning the silly phrases I've highlighted in her clips: Icy Australian beauty... fighting zombies of "Silent Hill" (2006)......

Is this man a monster? The president asked John Yoo to define torture. He did it. Are Yoo's "torture memos" one of the most heinous mistakes in American history--or could he have been right?
June 1, 2008... HE IS THE YOUNG JUSTICE DEPARTMENT LAWYER--thirty-four at the time-who wrote the Bush administration's first decisions on prisoner detention, interrogation, habeas corpus, military commissions, and the Geneva Conventions. He is the man who...

Gore Vidal: iconoclast, 82, Hollywood.(What I've Learned)(Interview)
June 1, 2008... * Somebody was here the other day from BBC Radio. It's odd to meet a rather elderly man who says, "I've been reading you all my life." It makes you feel a slight chili. * God has been expelled. I think he knows when he's on a losing...

The obscure sportsman's guide to wearing white: thirteen athletes show off their game and put a new spin on summer sportswear.(Esquire Style)(Buyers guide)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] GOKUL CHAKRAVARTHY BIG-SWINGIN' CRICKETER This page: Cotton-and-cashmere cricket vest ($298) and cotton-and-linen polo shirt ($90), Polo by Ralph Lauren; cotton trousers ($235) by CanalL Opposite: Cotton shirt...

Night stand.(ESQUIRE FICTION)(Short story)
June 1, 2008... [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] PELHAM CAME AWAKE one night to find a naked man standing over his bed, growling. There was little light in the bedroom, but he could see one of the man's arms, from shoulder to wrist, a grim tattoo of something...

Great works of literature as text messages.(This Way Out)(Brief article)
June 1, 2008... The Catcher in the Rye, BY J. D. SALINGER [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] The Great Catsby, BY F. SCOTT FITZGERALD [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Leaves of Grass, BY WALT WHITMAN [ILLUSTRATION OMITTED] Animal Farm, BY GEORGE ORWELL...